Money Honeys
Sugar Daddies Not So Sweet?
Shaun Rice
Issue date: 3/5/10 Section: Outside the Bubble
In a world where nearly everything has gone digital, it's no surprise that we've turned to the internet to help us find love. But where do you turn when the average online dating sites don't assess what really matters to you?
You might think I'm referring to something deeper than a website could measure, like values or trustworthiness. But what if you don't care about the things these sites ask about, like music taste or affinity for dogs? What if you're more concerned about your would-be partner's bank account? If this is the case, Match.com probably won't find you love.
You could, however, turn to one of the many sites dedicated to matching young, attractive and broke women, called Sugar Babies, up with rich, older Sugar Daddies (I'm not making this stuff up). These daddies are supposedly eager to lavish their younger, money-hungry lovers with Fendi handbags and Caribbean cruises. It may be possible to find your soul mate this way, though it seems more likely that you will find someone who is willing to exchange companionship for cash. Call me old fashioned, but this transaction seems more akin to prostitution than love.
Sites like Sugar Daddy For Me and Sugar Sugar relate the relationships they're trying to create to the "beneficial arrangements" historically made among royalty. And who wouldn't want to date like royalty?
Sugar Sugar writes, "These rich men of power enjoyed the friendship and intimacy of the world's most beautiful people; and they doted on those sugar babies, lavishing them with attention and gifts."
Is it just me, or do you want to throw up every time you hear the phrase "sugar babies"?
Apparently I'm not the only one-while these sites discuss the benefits of connecting a woman who needs her bills paid with a man willing to pay them, they also seem acutely aware of the fine line that exists between the service they provide and the exchange of sex for money. Sugar Daddy For Me explicitly states on the bottom of their homepage that online conversations discussing payment for sex are prohibited, though the website does recognize that it has no control over what is discussed by members offline.
While there may be no way to know what kind of beneficial arrangements members (who pay up to a $50 membership fee per month) are making offline, the websites do display member profiles and "success stories," which clearly illustrate what the Sugar Babies are looking for in the world of virtual matchmaking.
Amber, a featured member on one site, is a nineteen-year-old college student, or as she puts it, "A beautiful princess needing her prince to spoil her." On her profile, Amber describes her interests (pets, travel and family) and what she is looking for in a man ("treats me how I should be treated").
All in all, Amber's profile is not that much different than a typical dating site profile. Except when it comes to the topic of money. Amber won't settle for anyone who isn't willing to spoil her and make her "feel like the specialist woman ever." And good news for all of you aging, rich men-Amber is willing to date someone as old as 70. According to her, as long as you have the money, "age is just a number."
Jennifer, a twenty-six-year-old member of one of the many sites, wrote in to express her joy over her engagement to her sugar daddy boyfriend of two-and-a-half years. She lists the many vacations he has taken her on and reflects on her life before sugar.
Jennifer had filed bankruptcy and was losing everything when she met her "knight in shining armor" online. Her sugar daddy not only resolved her financial issues, but also bought her a Lexus, built her a stable for her horses and continues to make sure she is treated like royalty. If there was any remaining doubt at the hugely important role a monetary exchange plays in Jennifer's relationship, she quickly eliminates it by writing how she went "from struggling check-to-check to now being spoiled everyday! He still buys me presents and flowers and always makes sure my checking account has money."
And while the "levels of compatibility" on other mainstream matchmaking sites might seem somewhat contrived, websites of the Sugar Daddy variety beg the question of what compatibility points our relationships should be built upon.
Could Amber truly be happy with a random sixty-five-year-old man whom she quite possibly has nothing in common with, as long as he had the money to pay her bills? Will Jennifer's marriage to the man who saved her from bankruptcy and continues to lavish her with gifts actually last? When a relationship is built on something as unstable as wealth, can it ever achieve stability?
In an economy where our money, jobs and homes are fleeting, wouldn't a relationship based on love and real compatibility be more rewarding than having that new Louis Vuitton handbag? I'd say so, especially if you had to sleep with someone to get it.
 Media Credit: Google Images |
You could, however, turn to one of the many sites dedicated to matching young, attractive and broke women, called Sugar Babies, up with rich, older Sugar Daddies (I'm not making this stuff up). These daddies are supposedly eager to lavish their younger, money-hungry lovers with Fendi handbags and Caribbean cruises. It may be possible to find your soul mate this way, though it seems more likely that you will find someone who is willing to exchange companionship for cash. Call me old fashioned, but this transaction seems more akin to prostitution than love.
Sites like Sugar Daddy For Me and Sugar Sugar relate the relationships they're trying to create to the "beneficial arrangements" historically made among royalty. And who wouldn't want to date like royalty?
Sugar Sugar writes, "These rich men of power enjoyed the friendship and intimacy of the world's most beautiful people; and they doted on those sugar babies, lavishing them with attention and gifts."
Is it just me, or do you want to throw up every time you hear the phrase "sugar babies"?
Apparently I'm not the only one-while these sites discuss the benefits of connecting a woman who needs her bills paid with a man willing to pay them, they also seem acutely aware of the fine line that exists between the service they provide and the exchange of sex for money. Sugar Daddy For Me explicitly states on the bottom of their homepage that online conversations discussing payment for sex are prohibited, though the website does recognize that it has no control over what is discussed by members offline.
 Media Credit: SugarDaddyForMe.com |
Amber, a featured member on one site, is a nineteen-year-old college student, or as she puts it, "A beautiful princess needing her prince to spoil her." On her profile, Amber describes her interests (pets, travel and family) and what she is looking for in a man ("treats me how I should be treated").
All in all, Amber's profile is not that much different than a typical dating site profile. Except when it comes to the topic of money. Amber won't settle for anyone who isn't willing to spoil her and make her "feel like the specialist woman ever." And good news for all of you aging, rich men-Amber is willing to date someone as old as 70. According to her, as long as you have the money, "age is just a number."
 Media Credit: Google Images |
Jennifer had filed bankruptcy and was losing everything when she met her "knight in shining armor" online. Her sugar daddy not only resolved her financial issues, but also bought her a Lexus, built her a stable for her horses and continues to make sure she is treated like royalty. If there was any remaining doubt at the hugely important role a monetary exchange plays in Jennifer's relationship, she quickly eliminates it by writing how she went "from struggling check-to-check to now being spoiled everyday! He still buys me presents and flowers and always makes sure my checking account has money."
And while the "levels of compatibility" on other mainstream matchmaking sites might seem somewhat contrived, websites of the Sugar Daddy variety beg the question of what compatibility points our relationships should be built upon.
Could Amber truly be happy with a random sixty-five-year-old man whom she quite possibly has nothing in common with, as long as he had the money to pay her bills? Will Jennifer's marriage to the man who saved her from bankruptcy and continues to lavish her with gifts actually last? When a relationship is built on something as unstable as wealth, can it ever achieve stability?
In an economy where our money, jobs and homes are fleeting, wouldn't a relationship based on love and real compatibility be more rewarding than having that new Louis Vuitton handbag? I'd say so, especially if you had to sleep with someone to get it.
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